Things Only Tall People Understand
Unless you’ve spent endless nights sleeping with your legs drooping out the end of the bed, developing frostbite on the ends of your toes on those cold winter nights, you don’t even know the hard yards that come in the deal of being tall…and it’s not all fun and games.
A simple ‘run to the shops’ can quickly turn into an hour-long affair where complete strangers feel it’s completely fine to call upon you to grab the last packet of Tim Tams from that top shelf which they are unable to reach.
You hit your head on things. All the time. And trust me, people do see. If doctors were to perform head scans on every tall person, they would find bumps and dints all over.
Travelling is your worst enemy. Car trips are like travelling in a shoebox with tangled legs. Train rides mean your legs flood out into the isles, blocking the path of peak hour commuters. Now, don’t even get me started on plane trips. Your knees are instantly crushed as soon as the seatbelt sign turns off and the person in front of you slams their seat backwards.
Pants are always too short. Not even the fashionable ‘ankle-biter’ jean style kind of short, but the daggy ‘have-a-party-and-invite-your-pants-down’ kind of short. One size fits all, never fit. And when you ask yourself the question, “can I wear this shirt as a dress?” … the answer is always a definite no. Always.
When group photos are taken, you have two options. You automatically move towards the back of the group, feeling clunky and man-ish. Or you get back strain from the constant bending down to fit the limited height frame of those around you.
Everybody assumes you play sport, and that you are good at it. Now unless watching endless re-runs of the Big Bang Theory is considered a sport, then the latter statement is false.
And everybody hates you at the cinema. No explanation needed.
254763 - 2023-07-19 08:48:09
Copyright 2022 OatLabs ABN 18113479226