Sense of Being Alone

It's a feeling many of us try to avoid because it can be very scary and sad. It's a sense that we are not worthy or not significant in this world. It can be a time when you can't hide from yourself.

Being with others can help us feel connected, feel part of something, help us avoid strong feelings or tackle the difficult things we would rather avoid. It can be a great distraction to be with others. It can be helpful to hear about their lives and what struggles they are encountering with their lives. Hearing how they see the world and what they are doing about it can be really helpful.

Ultimately we know that we are all alone. We must make our own decisions, even if we are spending a lot of our time with others. We can be influenced and think about other people but we have the ultimate control over our lives. For some cultures this is not the way they see the world at all and I wonder about how comforting they may be. How being connected to each other is so pervasive that there's no capacity to think about one self as an isolated being.

We can reflect on the people in our lives and notice how people come and go from time to time. Friends and family members can be there sometimes but you can still feel alone. Being with people doesn't automatically mean that you don't have a sense of being alone. You can even feel more alone when surrounded by people. You can only hope that the people you share your life with can see you and help you not feel alone. Perhaps this is the ultimate positive relationship you could ever wish for.

A sense of being alone can also be empowering. Knowing that you are able to make your own decisions, live your life in a way that is meaningful and authentic to you could in fact be one's ultimate life goal. Sitting with any uncomfortable feelings and embracing the silences and opportunities to notice can be life affirming and sharpen one's focus on what's important. It can be difficult to do that when not alone.

Perhaps what one benefits most from is a balance in life. Embracing both the capacity to grow and learn from the times when one can be alone combined with the sense of solidarity and comfort that comes from close connections and support may indeed be the ultimate way to live one's life. Embracing the alone time might stop us fearing it and trying to find ways to flee from it.

#__Alone
#__Empowering
#__Meaningful
#__Authentic

%darlingshe