Reasons Why Winter Really Gives Me the Erks
With winter comes a beacon of hope for pale people, like myself, who can finally spend a few months hiding their pasty pale pins from the world, saving themselves from the orange hand syndrome you get from bottles and bottles of fake tan. But it's not all fun and games during this bitter time of the year.
Wet grass. There's nothing more annoying than being forced to spend your day in sopping wet shoes, all because people don't mow their lawns. Wet grass really does put a dampener on your day. That squelchy sound your shoes make for the remainder of your day should only be reserved for farm animals to hear, not busy workers in the heart of a city.
Customers complaining 'it's too hot.' Have they even considered that maybe it wouldn't be so hot if they took off their jackets. Or were sitting cleaning jewellery in a little cold shop.
Car heaters. They never work, or work too well. Or take for-ev-errrr to actually to do their job. And by the time they have actually heated up the car, you've reached your destination and it's time to brave the frosty air outside.
Wet pets. Everyone's been here, when your furry four legged friend goes outside, exploring the wet dewy shrubbery, then wants to come back inside, soaking wet. And what's even worse, is when they come crawling back for a cuddle on the couch, walking their wet paws and dirty fur all over our warm, snuggly blankets.
Frizzy hair. It ruins my day almost as much as squelchy shoes. Perfecting your sleek and shiny locks which took ages to master can quickly turn into a poofy disaster when you walk out the doors, into the frosty morning thickset with fog and dew. It's really not a nice sight for anybody.
Heavy bags. Bags are always heavier in winter. And it's all because you have to pack more clothes and more jackets to knock out the winter chills. No matter how strategically you pack your bag, whether for day or night, it always ends up heavier, jam packed full of stuff you never would contemplate taking with you in the sunnier months.
Now eating gooey chocolate brownies and chocolate cakes with cream and warm hot chocolates and watching movies and lazing around in your pyjamas until noon is definitely a perk of winter.
254790 - 2023-07-19 08:48:29