In Part One
of Some Male Thoughts About Online Dating I wrote about why some men use online dating and the advantages they found. In Part Two I will write about some of the disadvantages, thoughts on honesty and dishonesty and the success of online dating. Thanks to the guys who were prepared to answer my questions about their experience of online dating.
What do you see as the disadvantages of online dating?
Some said they miss eye contact and body language as part of the interaction. Others said women sometimes don’t look like their photos. Some women are quick to judge a man solely on his looks or a false assumption and won’t agree even to chat online.
Some found online dating somewhat impersonal. Also, it could be difficult to be online at the right time to make contact with a particular woman. One man said having to be prepared to ‘take it slow’ was a disadvantage. Another said some dating sites were ‘aggressive’ with their adverts which popped up everywhere. He felt some of the adverts shouldn’t be allowed.
One man said he doesn’t like it when a woman accepts a request to make contact but then doesn’t chat. He also said he doesn’t like it when women don’t ask any questions online. Another disadvantage is that on occasions women use an online site as a place to vent their frustrations about previous relationships
Do you feel that women are more honest or less honest online compared to face to face meetings?
I got a range of opinions in answer to this question. Some felt women on online dating sites are mostly genuine. There were those who said women were more honest online, with one man saying women tell you straight up what they think online but would be ‘more polite’ face to face.
Others thought women were less honest online. Some thought women were much more
dishonest online than in face-to-face contact. There were those who said it was easy to get conned in terms of age, looks and whether the woman was in a relationship or not.
One man was particularly understanding. He said he would not be bothered if a woman lied about her age in her profile. He said age didn’t matter if there was chemistry. In addition he said it would be okay if a woman said she didn’t have children and it turned out that she did have, as long as she had a ‘valid reason’ for lying. He said some women don’t want to explain all about their life until they know a guy better.
A few men had experienced ‘scammers’ and ‘gold diggers’. There were those who said they had come across younger women who were looking for a ‘sugar daddy’. A couple of men commented there were women who were looking for a lonely man who would pay for everything and wait on them hand and foot.
How successful do you feel online dating has been for you?
Most of the men who answered my questions felt they had experienced at least some degree of success through online dating. Those who were new to online dating tended to be unsure how to answer because they hadn’t been online for long. The definition of success varied from person to person and depended on what the individual was looking for.
The successes included ‘have met a lot of great ladies’ and having made some friends. Some men said online dating had led to girl friends, friend with benefits or short relationships.
It would appear online dating is here to stay. People of all ages are now more willing to try online dating than when it first started. Online dating will probably become more common in the years to come.
# Male Perspective
# Online dating