Has your fella just popped the question? Have you said yes? Are you sure you mean yes? Well, make sure you are. This is the rest of your life we are talking about, right?
I have been engaged twice in my life and looking back the first time was a clear fail. I remember getting to the age of 26 and being the next one in line for a big wedding, in my family. I remember panic setting in, I hadn’t met ‘the one’ I didn’t think. I was however with a guy that would do; I mean he’d make a good husband and a great Father. I knew deep down wasn’t right but yet I kept pushing it. It was time, I had to get married and he would do.
There was something missing though, I just knew it in my gut. Luckily for me I realised in time, had courage and broke it off. It was scary and the further down the line the wedding planning got, the harder it was. I had bridesmaids and flower girls chosen amongst deposits that had been paid. We lost some money and of course pride but I am so grateful I called it off, as hard as it was.
This relationship really made me realise that you can be so very lonely when with the wrong man. Some years later I met my now husband and knew it was right from day dot. I really owe this instinctive ‘knowing’ to being engaged to the wrong man.
My main point is this: if you have said ‘yes’ and it doesn’t feel right you can still back out no matter how far down the planning process you are. Listen to your gut feeling and trust it, you just don’t know what’s round the corner. A wrong engagement isn’t a disaster; it can actually help you work out what you actually do want in a husband. Breaking it off with Mr Wrong frees up space for Mr Right to come in.
I can’t promise a happy ever after. After all relationships even with ‘the right guy’ are a lot of hard work and perfection just doesn’t exist. Following your gut always guarantees you a feeling of being ‘right on track’ though. With the right guy, you’ll feel content in your choice and embark on a crazy life journey together. That feeling you can’t beat for the world; it really is worth waiting for.
So, my advice is this: don’t waste time engaged to Mr Wrong, gather the courage to break it off and wait for Mr Right. It’s after all no less than you deserve.